This morning I awoke to the sad news that Elizabeth Edwards’ health had taken a downward spiral, and another kind of mourning began. Although this news wasn’t altogether unexpected, it was certainly heart wrenching. I wanted, and still hang on to a thread of hope and light, for her to live longer. I do not want her two young children to have their memories of their mother tainted by their father and his spaced out mistress who seems to enjoy playing the victim to the choices she made. Yet I don’t blame her for the affair. She had no contract with Elizabeth Edwards; emotional, marital, or otherwise. No that rests squarely on the shoulders of her husband, John Edwards, whose opinion of himself seems to have outweighed every rational thought process one should entertain before falling for trite overused come-ons, especially when he was front and center of a presidential campaign. We fell for his charm and family values studded speeches in NC. We felt his grief when he talked about Wade, the son who was tragically killed in an accident. We, and I say we as part of the disappointed NC collective, were proud of their accomplishments, ability to overcome sorrow, to lead community programs. Oh how far he has fallen! To think of her suffering and torment as she dealt with the rumors, the half-truths and innuendos, her recurring cancer in the face of his infidelity made worse by lies and more lies then forced by virtue of the Enquirer to confess. I have often wondered what Elizabeth was doing while John was out sowing his wild oats. Mostly, knowing that her children were her sole consideration, I picture her baking cookies or reading to them, driving them to school activities and the library, all while being in pain both physically and emotionally. Who has been there to pick her up off the bathroom floor after a treatment, or comb her hair when she was too weak to lift her arms over her head? I’m sure she has great friends but her husband’s care and love might have made a difference in her healing. Instead, I fear he added to her stress and sped up the illness. To Elizabeth Edwards I would like to send love and light and if the time really is near for her departure, then we know she has an angel waiting for her in heaven who she has been longing to see.